Be Easy in Life & You Will Be “Lucky”

 

Hi Guys,

Sorry it’s been so long since I have posted on here but I have been crazy busy with work, family, and writing for Elite Daily. I feel like life has blessed me with literally everything good it could possibly offer. I am hoping to blog soon but in the meantime here is a little something to think about..

I was getting a mani/pedi on Friday and received a strange compliment from the lady doing my nails. After her first application of OPI polish she said to me “you are a lucky person.” At first I thought she had meant I was lucky because I had my mother and grandmother with me but she then said ” you are lucky because I can see you are an easy person to please so good things flow your way.” I smiled and thanked her.. I have since thought
about that compliment and thought I would share my sentiments:

The lady was right. The easier you are to please, the more enjoyable life is. If you have it in your head that you must have the window seat and you end up with the middle seat, your flight becomes miserable. If you like to sit a certain way in a restaurant and the place if full your dinner experience is ruined. If you have dietary requirements it makes life a little more difficult going to dinner parties. If you absolutely hate the rain and you spend $3000 on your dream vacation and it happens to rain, you will have wasted $3000.

I have been reading Longevity book by Cameron Diaz and she states that research shows the easier you are to please and the happier you are of a person, the longer you are likely to live.

In life we all have our preferences but the more preferences we have, the chances of our satisfaction decreases. The less expectations we set, the more chance we have for enjoyment. Be as easy as you can be in life because you will find the easier you are to please, the more life will please you 🙂

JS

10 Life Lessons That Are Best Learned From Your Grandparents

ORIGINAL ARTICLE WAS POSTED BY ELITE DAILY

Grandparents are the kale in the salad of life. They came first, they have the most to offer you and most of the time, they are under appreciated.

My grandmother will be 76 on April 15, Tax Day. This is the first birthday I will spend with her in over a decade. It’s not because I was busy doing other things, it’s because she lives in my home country of South Africa. You may be thinking that an article about a 76-year-old woman has nothing to offer a young an on fleek Millennial such as yourself, but I can assure you that you are wrong.

I feel extremely blessed to have a grandparent alive and although she lives 10,391 miles away, she has spent the last four months with us in the US. I have treasured that time and the time did fly by. So in honor of my granny’s birthday, I want to list all of the invaluable things I have learned from her, and what you can learn from your grandparents as well:

1. Be present with the people you are with.

My grandmother has sarcastically commented about my incessant need to be glued to my phone numerous times. Sometimes I think she just does not understand my generation, but then I remember she understands something beyond my generation often does not.

She understands and knows what is truly important in life. Put your phone down when you are at dinner with your friends and loved ones; give them your full attention. This is an excellent rule for dating, too.

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2. Know the value of friendship.

Granny has a bigger circle of gay friends than Carrie from “Sex And The City.” She makes it to every fabulous dinner party and she enjoys being the life of the party. Aside from her fabulous gay friends, granny is loved by everyone, and I mean literally everyone. She makes friends everywhere she goes and has kept in touch with all of her school friends.

Cherish your friends, and don’t be closed off to making new friends or including new friends in plans with the old friends. Granny always says “No house is too small; the more the merrier.” Consider that when planning your next dinner party.

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3. Be independent.

Granny has not had an easy life. Her mother died on her 13th birthday, her father died at a young age and my grandfather recently died. When my grandfather died, we wondered how is this woman was going to go on. Yet, she has proven us all wrong. Granny is the most independent woman I know. She never let life stop when my grandfather died.

She started paying her own bills, learning to fix things and learning to be comfortable with driving again. The hardest challenge was when she flew 23 hours by herself to spend time with us. Sometimes we go through a break up or something tragic happens and we feel as though life won’t go on, but learn from granny and know life does go on and you can live.

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4. Muster all the strength you have.

When my grandfather became ill, granny became his caretaker and did everything for her him on her own. She was there when he felt nauseous after chemotherapy. She was there to drive him to all of his appointments at the hospital. She was there to make him laugh and was there for all of us.

Her strength is admirable. Sometimes in life we are faced with a challenge we think is insurmountable. But instead of cowering away, you have to pull all the strength you have inside of you and when you think you have pulled out everything you have, pull even more.

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5. Have unconditional love for your partner.

It still haunts me to think back to my grandfather dying in the hospital. I still tear up thinking of how my once robust pot-bellied grandfather was lying there  probably weighing a little over 100 pounds. In that moment, I witnessed true unconditional love when my granny entered the room cheery as ever to feed him. I have such a clear memory of her saying “My goodness, you look so handsome today. Would you like some water?”

He couldn’t speak, but he nodded his head and smiled. She gave him the water. I thought to myself, this is the kind of love I want one day. Luckily, I met the man of my dreams after a few years. Don’t go looking for superficial qualities in a partner, because circumstances may change. Love that person unconditionally for better or for worse.

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6. Maintain your youthfulness.

Granny is incredibly tech-savvy, up to date with current music, knows how to contour with highlighter and bronzer and follows all of the latest celebrity gossip (she may or may not refer to the Kardashians as if they were family friends of hers). Granny is well versed in not only emoji, but also Bitmoji.

She can not only text you, but she can also WhatsApp you. Granny will also probably kill me when this article comes out, since she tells people she is 35. You may feel as though you are getting older every year, but age is just a number. Stay young at heart and don’t get too old too fast.

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7. Know the value of a good tune.

The first thing granny will say when she sees me is “Ooh, I downloaded the most beautiful music.” She will ask strangers if they have heard of André Rieu, her favorite composer. When they say no, she will scoff and tell them how well known he is internationally. Granny is passionate about music of all genres. She is truly a music aficionado.

Once she asked me if I wanted to listen to Frank Sinatra and I said “I’ll listen later granny.” She then promptly reminded me that she listens to my music when I ask her to. After she said that, I realized she was right and I began crooning “New York, New York” completely out of tune with her.

Take time to appreciate your grandparents’ music. If they are no longer alive, take time to appreciate your parents’ music. Music is a powerful tool, and often a window into understanding someone’s soul.

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8. Don’t take life too seriously.

Not only does granny tell people she is 35 years old, but she also tells people she has many boyfriends, who are all celebrities, of course. Granny is a big believer that laughter is the best medicine. Not only can she make you laugh, but she will laugh at any of your jokes, and I mean any.

Sometimes we get caught up in the seriousness of life. Sometimes we bring work stress home or personal stress to work. Don’t do this. Instead, realize that life is short and it’s far too short to spend aggravated over things that will seem insignificant in hindsight.

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9. Understand the importance of good skincare.

Granny has porcelain skin. People always comment on how gorgeous her skin is and I am secretly hoping I have inherited that from her. So far so good. She has a very simple routine that involves a Dove Beauty Bar and a washcloth. I, of course, have started following in her footsteps by using the Dove Beauty Bar in hopes of having her skin when I get to be her age.

You may have just gotten home from a party and are too lazy to take off your makeup, but just do it. Take care of your skin and make sure your nightly routine is never skipped. Also try the Dove Beauty Bar with a washcloth instead of a hard exfoliator. It works wonders and makes your shower smell amazing.

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10. Stay in love with life.

Granny is constantly in a state of amazement. We live in an age where people are bored with technology and want newer things faster, but granny is so amazed at all the technology we have in the US. She is amazed at how I can type an entire text message without looking. Granny thinks life is truly amazing. We take so much for granted and we are so quick to say we’re bored. But instead of feeling bored with life, find a way to fall in love with it again and view life as amazing.

My dad has always said that the single most important person in the family is granny. She is the matriarch. He could not be more right. Granny has taught me so much in life and I appreciate and love her more than I could put into words. She is the one person who pushes me to write and has kept all of my written pieces since I was a child up until now.

If you are lucky enough to have a grandparent still alive, treasure it. Make time for your grandparents because the wisdom they have to offer you is invaluable. In the salad of life, we may get caught up eating the exciting fruits and vegetables or dousing everything with the creamy dressing, but the kale is where most of the nutrients are.

If I have any regrets in life it, will be about every time I told my grandparents we could do something later. Life is short and a later is never promised. Happy birthday to my gorgeous grandmother. Your life has given us all life, and you are truly nothing less than a fabulous invaluable gem.

6 Ways To De-Stress Before Bed When You Can’t Stop Thinking About Work

ORIGINAL ARTICLE WAS POSTED BY ELITE DAILY

It has become an achievement to get less than eight hours of sleep. People often brag at the office that they only got five hours of sleep the night prior. As we have become increasingly obsessed with technology, we spend more time than ever checking our phones at night, responding to late-night emails and scrolling through our news feeds on Facebook instead of shutting down, shutting off and shutting our eyes.

I have always been a morning person. I was always the kid who woke up before the alarm, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to start the day. I never needed much sleep growing up. In fact, I never needed much sleep in college, either. This all changed when I hit my mid-20s.

I started to notice the fact that with less sleep, my skin was not as bright, my energy was a roller coaster solely dependent upon caffeine and my eating habits were poorer than they were on a good eight hours of sleep. (I may or may not have had Kit Kats for lunch.)

When I met my boyfriend, one of the first things he told me was he needed the same amount of sleep every night, and he had specific steps he would take to achieve that. I legitimately thought he was a nut. Sleep is sleep, so who cares if you get five hours or eight hours?

I laughed when he told me he goes to bed at 8:30 pm, thinking, “Wow, I have not done that since I was a kid.” As time went on and we began spending more and more time together, leading to him eventually moving in, I became just as serious about my sleep as he is. And boy, did it pay off. My skin was brighter, my weight was steadier, I was radiating infectious energy and I started really looking forward to bed every night.

I implore you to start reconsidering the amount of sleep and the quality of sleep you are getting every night. Try getting eight hours of good sleep for a week, and see for yourself the difference it makes. You spend at least eight hours a day kicking ass at work, so reward yourself by giving your body eight hours a night to recover and restore.

Here are six tips to help you achieve a better, deeper night’s rest:

1. Warm Shower And Moisturize

I like to take a hot shower after my nightly workout, and I use that time to soak and destress. I like to “wash away the day,” if you will.

Some people skip their nightly shower or bath, but I think it really makes a difference when I feel clean and get into bed. Also, I make sure every bit of my makeup is off, and I take the time to hydrate my skin with good moisturizers so that while I’m sleeping, my skin is getting refreshed and moisturized. (I’m hopefully combating the aging process.)

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2. Unwind

The last hour before bed, I don’t like my mind to be concerned with serious or pressing issues. I like to mentally unwind.

To do this, I either read a few chapters from a feel-good book, chat with my boyfriend or if my day was more stressful than usual and I am having trouble winding down, I will simply just do a little yoga breathing.

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3. Switch Off

Something that has really helped me get a better, more meaningful night’s rest is moving my phone away from my bedside table. I was notorious for checking my work email at 2 am or any time I would wake up to use the restroom.

This became unhealthy, and it really disrupted my sleep. How ridiculous is it to concern yourself with matters you can do nothing about at 2 am?

Let your phone rest while you are resting. Now my phone also gets eight hours of rest, and it’s plugged in far away from my bedside.

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4. Sleepy Time Tea

The most effective way I achieve a good night’s sleep is through tea. I use either Yogi Bedtime in soothing caramel or Sleepytime Celestial Seasoning in vanilla.

Both do a phenomenal job of helping me nod off and stay in a deep sleep. It hits me almost immediately, and it helps me to relax and shut off. I have come to look forward to my warm cup of sweetness right before bed.

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5. White Noise

White noise will drown out any annoying sounds you would have otherwise heard throughout the night. I use the White Noise app, which is free on the App Store.

There are many sounds to choose from. Pick one that makes you feel the most relaxed and drowns out the most noise. If you’re like me and you have a dog that likes to bark at night, this will really help combat the barking. It will not, however, drown out inconsiderate neighbors who decide to hammer nails into the wall in the middle of the night.

Set the white noise to stop a couple of hours before you wake up so you don’t feel groggy upon awaking.

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6. Say Goodnight

If you are sleeping with a loved one, don’t just roll over when you decide it’s time to sleep. Instead, give your partner a goodnight kiss, and tell your partner you love him or her.

Don’t take it for granted that you have found someone you love enough to share a life with. Regardless of whether or not you have a bedfellow, think of three things you are grateful for, and spend a few quiet moments appreciating them. This will put you in a calm, happy mood before bed, and it will help ensure you have a peaceful night’s rest.

We have become a society where hard work is rewarded, and rest is frowned upon. Your body is far more important than your job because without your body, you wouldn’t even have a job.

That email you woke up at 2 am to read and stress over will still be there at 6 am. Prioritize a good night’s sleep. As Thomas Dekker said,

Sleep is the golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.

How Getting A Breast Reduction In My 20s Gave Me My Life Back

ORIGINAL ARTICLE WAS POSTED BY ELITE DAILY

I recently stumbled upon a picture of “Modern Family” actress Ariel Winter confidently rocking an absolutely stunning black dress on the red carpet at the SAG Awards, and I noticed her visible breast reduction scars.

This brought me back to about six years ago when I made the difficult decision to remove the weight off my chest and have breast reduction surgery.

The physical scars have healed, but the scars of the insane amount of physical and emotional weight I carried all those years will probably never fully heal.

I had no boobs until age 14. In fact, I was so flat-chested that my first boyfriend broke up with me because his older brother told him there were girls out there with bigger cup sizes. We were 11, but it still hurt.

A bigger chest became something I wished for as all my friends were developing melons, and I was still the owner of two flat pancakes on my chest. I will never doubt the saying, “Be careful what you wish for,” since I ended up being an 18-year-old woman with a cup size of FFF.

I should preface this with the fact that I am a pretty small person and always have been, so carrying all this weight took a huge physical toll on my body.

I was never overly athletic by any means, but I always enjoyed going straight to the gym after school. I loved the freeing sensation of running on the treadmill and the immense feeling of gaining strength with every set of weights I lifted.

By age 16, I had a cup size of DDD, and I was assigned all kinds of names that immature adolescent boys like to assign young ladies with big breasts.

The most hurtful name I was assigned was “bimbo.” I guess having a big chest and blonde hair made me a bimbo?

I always considered myself to be intelligent, fairly philosophical and much more than a blonde with big boobs. I began to think that if these young men weren’t going to take me seriously, how would a future employer take me seriously?

Was I going to just always be a blonde with big boobs? Should I skip college and try to apply for Hooters?

Luckily, my high school boyfriend was a very respectful and kind young man, and he really supported me through all this bullying.

Eventually, as most high school couples do, by the end of senior year, we grew apart and broke up. For the first time, I was single and had to deal with all of the unwanted attention on my own.

In freshman year of college, I dyed my Barbie blonde hair raven black to try to combat the bimbo stereotype. Truthfully, I loved the look, but I hated all of the Kim Kardashian comparisons. So, I dyed it back to blonde.

My cup size had increased to an astounding FFF, and because of that, I stopped working out. When you have to wear three sports bras and your boobs are still bouncing up and down uncontrollably, you tend to get unmotivated to work out.

After a year of weight gain from not working out, I became completely self-conscious. My parents noticed my unhappiness and asked if I wanted to have a breast reduction, the same surgery both my mother and grandmother had years ago.

I was nervous to do it, but I decided that I deserved to feel confident and happy again. I made the call to schedule a consultation with a local, well-rated plastic surgeon.

After the consultation, which left my chest looking like two dart boards with all of the sharpie markings they wrote on me, I felt confident that having breast reduction surgery was the right choice for me.

Initially, I wanted to go from FFF to an A cup, but after much convincing, the doctor persuaded me to go to a full D cup with a lift.

I scheduled my surgery to be done over spring break of my sophomore year. The surgery itself was painless, and I was under general anesthesia the whole time. So, I obviously don’t have any recollection of the actual surgery.

The nurse told me while they administered the anesthesia I called the surgeon “super gorgeous.”

“Awesome, going in for post-op checkup the next day is going to be fun,” was the thought that ran through my head.

I got home loopy as ever from all of the Vicodin they gave me, but even through my loopy-ness, I looked in the mirror and saw I was finally tiny.

Tears were streaming down my cheeks, but this time, they were tears of joy. I went from wearing an extra large shirt to a small.

I had very minimal discomfort after the surgery. The main discomfort was not being able to lift my arms above my head, which made washing my hair impossible. Luckily, my mom was there to help wash my hair, and we made the best of it, as moms and daughters always do.

Of course, those same asshats who nicknamed me in high school wrote negative comments such as, “Why would you slap God in the face and do this to yourself?” on a selfie I posted of my new, much smaller body.

But because I was truly happy with my decision and had finally reached the level of self-confidence I desired, their comments had zero effect on me.

My life changed completely after having the surgery. I began to fall back in love with the gym and lost all the weight I had gained during the time I was forced into a sedentary lifestyle.

I dyed my hair back to black, and I began to wear cute, lower-cut tops without feeling too revealing and without worrying about being called a bimbo. I got compliments on my big blue eyes rather than my chest size. I began to live without being self-conscious.

Having breast reduction surgery truly changed my life, and I will forever be grateful to my understanding parents and friends for being so encouraging and supportive of my choice to have the surgery.

The physical scars have faded, but as I write this, I am tearing up. It brings back all of the emotional scars of being labeled and of being so painfully uncomfortable in my body.

When the surgeon removed the physical weight from my chest, he unknowingly also removed the emotional weight that I had been carrying in my heart.

Next time you encounter someone who is considering having plastic surgery, try to understand and be supportive of his or her choice. Although that person make look fine the way he or she is to you, you don’t know what inner turmoil someone is going through.

And please, to the men who read this, do not be so quick to call a woman a bimbo because of her appearance, and don’t ask her if she is part of “the big titty committee” or the “itty bitty titty committee.”

It may seem like meaningless words to you, and it may give you and your friends a good laugh.

But, I promise you that if a woman is feeling self-conscious, your laughter will come at the expense of her tears. She will remember your words as she uncomfortably looks at herself in the mirror that night.

10 Tips To Help Any Zodiac Sign Win The Heart Of An Aquarius

ORIGINAL ARTICLE WAS POSTED BY ELITE DAILY

Aquarians are like the unicorns of the zodiac.

They march to the beat of their own drum and tend to be eccentric people.

They possess bold and mysterious personalities.

If you have your heart set on an Aquarian, and you want to know what it’s like to love and be loved by one, I will tell you.

As an Aquarius with 26 years of experience, you should prepare for the longest, but most worthwhile love battle of your life.

When it comes to Aquarians, you have to give them plenty of time, you have to let them get to know you and most of all, you have to make them feel like they are free, loved and wanted, all at the same time.

Basically, an Aquarius is one big, walking contradiction.

I will promise you one thing, though.

If you do end up with an Aquarius, you will never be bored.

Here are 10 tips to help you win over an Aquarius:

1. Be genuine.

Aquarians are reflective, serious and sincere people.

The minute we feel like you are being insincere, we get turned off.

We don’t respond well to disingenuous flattery, and we can always tell when it’s disingenuous.

If you really spend the time getting to know an Aquarius, compliment him or her on traits unique to that person’s personality.

This will go a long way, and we’ll know you have a genuine interest in getting to know us.

When it comes to gift-giving, do not shower your Aquarius in diamonds or expensive flashy items.

He or she won’t appreciate it as much as you would think.

Because Aquarians are such sentimental beings, we respond much better to gifts with sentimental value as opposed to monetary value.

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2. Be a friend first.

Don’t rush things. Aquarians have massive guards up at all times.

Take the time to get to know your Aquarius.

It takes a long time for an Aquarius to open up, so building a friendship and taking it slow will allow for him or her to feel safe enough to open up to you.

Also, we are incredibly playful, so if you can joke around with us and be our best friend, we may start to see you in a romantic light eventually.

When it comes to an Aquarius, the friend zone is not necessarily a bad place to be in.

It’s simply a stepping stone.

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3. Be philanthropic.

Here’s where the personality of an Aquarius becomes complicated.

We may seem cold and detached because we don’t open up easily, but when it comes to strangers and their problems, we attach ourselves quickly and will do anything we can to help.

We have the world’s problems on our shoulders at all times, and we are essentially natural-born humanitarians.

The minute we see you have a humanitarian side, you’ll get big points in our books.

I once went on a date with a guy, and while we were walking to the restaurant, I spotted a homeless man.

I made a comment about how sad it made me feel to see someone in that situation, and my date pulled out a few bucks and handed it to him.

It immediately won me over.

Bonus tip: A great date idea when it comes to Aquarius is to suggest volunteering together.

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4. Be prepared to debate.

Aquarians are strong-willed individuals.

If we wholeheartedly believe in something, we will fight for it, all while being extremely tolerant of other people’s viewpoints.

Please don’t mistake this as us being argumentative or stubborn.

Instead, try to understand that this is because we are passionate about our beliefs.

The best way to win an argument with an Aquarius is to use a combination of facts and different scenarios.

If you use this method to persuade an Aquarius, he or she will likely apologize and try to see things your way.

Aquarians are complex, but we are definitely not stupid or incapable of apologizing.

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5. Do not try to fool an Aquarius.

Aquarians are truth-seekers, and we can spot a liar in an instant.

If we sense you are lying to us, then you might as well lose our numbers.

We care so much about this because we are loyal.

We have a strong sense of moral obligation, and we expect you to have the same.

If you try to pull a fast one on us, we won’t give you a second chance.

If you are planning on rescheduling your date with an Aquarius, be prepared to show proof of whatever tragedy you claim happened that caused you to reschedule.

Otherwise, your chances of scoring a second date are slim to none.

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6. Woo an Aquarius with intelligence and quick wit.

Aquarians are extremely witty, sarcastic and charming.

If you can entertain us with witty banter for hours and talk about worldly affairs, we will want to keep you around for a very long time.

Also, if you can tolerate our sarcasm and keep us on our toes with your own humor, we will start to crave your company.

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7. Learn to love an Aquarius’ idealistic views.

Aquarians are almost always in an existential crisis.

We are natural-born philosophers, and our anthem is “Imagine” by John Lennon.

Not only do we want peace and harmony, but we also believe both are possible.

Every time we hear about a past or present tragedy, we start to question the meaning of life.

We are constantly questioning the existence of God, and if there is a God, how he could let these tragic events occur.

Although you may view us as childish and idealistic because of this, don’t verbalize that.

Instead, learn to embrace our idealism and realize that if we care so deeply, then our capacity to love and care for you is endless.

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8. If you love an Aquarius, then set him or her free.

We hate to feel trapped, and if you try to control us, we will run.

It takes a secure person to win the heart of an Aquarius.

If you start questioning us and going through our text messages, we won’t take kindly to it and will begin to pull away from you.

As I mentioned before, we are extremely loyal and have high moral obligations.

So, it’s very unlikely we would be doing anything worthy of your concern.

Trust is everything with an Aquarius.

Once you lose ours, you lose us.

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9. Never give up.

Although it may take a while for an Aquarius to let down his or her massive guard, once it happens, you will be pleased you stuck around.

Aquarians aren’t likely to rush into anything, so if you are tenacious enough to stick around, we will be yours.

Aquarians are very unlikely to want commitment.

If you really love an Aquarius, then fight for the relationship and make him or her feel secure enough to let down the guard.

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10. Prepare for the most hypnotizing and unique long-term relationship.

Once you have won the heart of an Aquarius, and he or she has let down the guard, you will never have to doubt his or her dedication to the relationship.

We are incredibly spontaneous and will show our love by surprising you with dinner or small, sentimental gifts.

We will spend our time lifting you up and encouraging you to follow all of your dreams.

We are extremely verbal, and we will constantly remind you how much you mean to us, how much we appreciate you and how loved you are.

If you give us your heart, we will give you ours.

I promise you it will be the biggest heart you have ever possessed.

It takes a very special, patient and secure kind of person to love and be loved by an Aquarian.

If you are that person, I wish you the best of luck on your quest to win the heart of your chosen Aquarius.

You’ll need it.

16 New Year’s Resolutions To Make For Each Phase Of Your 20s

ORIGINAL ARTICLE WAS POSTED BY ELITE DAILY

I have always loved the idea of creating a list of improvements to make and goals to attain for the next year — aka New Year’s Resolutions.

In 2015, my main goal was to rein in my shoe shopping, secondary to my primary goal of finding love.

Both were accomplished.

While getting in shape, paying rent on time, eating healthier, finding love and refraining from canceling happy hour plans are probably on every 20-something’s New Year’s Resolutions list, I implore you to dig deeper and look within yourself.

If you are in your 20s, now is the time to get serious and really think about how to manifest the life you have always dreamed of for yourself.

Here are 16 practical New Year’s resolutions every 20-something should make for 2016:

Early 20s:

1. Get a job.

If you have just graduated, your number one goal should be to obtain a job.

Jobs aren’t easy to come by these days, so I highly recommend going through a temp agency as a good way to get your foot in the door.

2. “Spend what is left after saving.” — Warren Buffet

I got my first big girl job right out of college, and my love of Urban Decay Naked palettes, Kate Spade shoes and fancy cocktails stunted my savings growth.

I always thought I was so young and I could start saving later on in life.

Although six years later, my savings account has a greater net worth than my makeup collection, if I had started saving as much as I save now immediately after I deposited my first paycheck, I would be in an even better place financially.

Time is your friend; the time to save is now.

3. Make a life for yourself.

If you are moving somewhere new because you found a great job or if you are moving back home but your friends have moved away, get out there and make the effort to meet people.

My parents moved to California from Nevada halfway through my college education.

So when I decided to move home, I knew almost nobody.

Through online dating and social sites such as Meetup, I managed to create meaningful relationships with some of the most wonderful people I could ever dream of meeting.

It’s important to realize nobody is coming to your door to befriend you. You have to put yourself out there and make the effort if you want to have friends.

Mid-20s:

4. Get your ass to the gym.

This is the most common New Year’s resolution.

How do I know this? Well, on the first Monday of every January my beloved gym is suddenly packed with people.

Most gym rats resent this, but I think, hey, the more the merrier (unless all the elliptical machines are taken).

If you have never set foot in the gym before, start off by doing just 20 minutes of cardio twice a week and increase as time goes on.

Don’t spend tons of money on new gym outfits either.

Rather, wear whatever athletic clothes you currently own and treat yourself to new athletic items for every month you religiously make it to the gym.

The hardest part for me is not even just getting there, it’s getting out of bed.

It’s so easy to hit the snooze button on my phone.

In order to prevent myself from doing that, I moved my phone far away from bed so I actually have to get up to turn it off.

5. Have faith in love.

It’s simple. Good people exist and most people just want to love and be loved.

Have faith and keep an open heart in order to find your love of your life.

6. Treat others as they treat you.

This is harsh, but it will save you some heartache.

If you are constantly disappointed in friends or people in general because you feel that you bend over backwards for them and they don’t return the favor, stop bending over backwards for them.

Yes, you should go out of your way for great friends and good people, but only if they would do the same for you.

7. Invest in a good skincare regimen.

It’s so much easier to combat aging before we age. Investing in a good skincare regimen is the best thing we can do for ourselves visually to slow down the aging process.

Ladies, I know it’s a hassle to take off your makeup before bed, but it’s crucial for your face that you do.

Find a good makeup remover, exfoliator, moisturizer and eye cream and be judicious about keeping up with your skincare.

8. Live alone if financially possible.

Living alone, especially as a female, is extremely important.

You grow up so much when you are solely responsible for all of your bills and you are your own household manager.

Now some people simply just can’t afford to live by themselves due to financial restraints, and that’s okay too.

9. Learn to combat negativity.

As a writer, I get comments all the time saying I’m stupid, my writing is horrible and pretty much every mean thing you could say to someone, I’ve heard it.

Realize you don’t know these people or what they are going through.

Happy people do not go online and start tearing down other people because they just don’t have the time or urge to do that.

Learn to ignore the harsh meaningless negativity you receive from people and focus on the positive.

10. Go after what you want.

I have always hated the saying, “good things come to those who wait,” probably because I’m an extremely impatient person, but I also believe we manifest our own destiny.

If you want something or someone go after it with everything you have.

It’s better to try your hardest and fail than to never try at all.

11. Invest in a good bed.

We spend so much of our lives in bed.

Investing in a good bed is a surefire way to save ourselves from countless bills from the chiropractor later on in life.

I’m 26 and sleeping on the same bed I slept on in high school, so this makes me a hypocrite, but it’s definitely on my personal New Year’s resolutions list.

Late 20s:

12. Save for retirement.

Look into other retirement saving methods in addition to a 401(k).

Suze Orman, one of my personal favorite finance gurus, recommends opening up a Roth IRA before you turn 30, in order to reach your goal of financial security before retirement.

Remember, with saving money for retirement, time is your ally.

13. Revaluate your healthcare plan.

Maybe you picked the cheapest healthcare plan last year because you figured you were young and healthy and could use the extra paycheck money.

That may have worked out splendidly for you, but just think about the fact that your body is aging along with you.

You might want to rethink the importance of having the best medical care available.

My advice to you is to find a five star MD, OBGYN, ophthalmologist and dentist and pick the plan that is contracted with them.

A good doctor can potentially save you not only money, but also lots of time if you have a complicated illness to diagnose.

14. Settle down but don’t settle.

If you are lucky enough to find your person, don’t let him or her go. Focus on creating a life together.

We aren’t getting any younger, so if you have found yourself a secure relationship and the two of you can discuss finance, careers, children and long term goals, don’t go looking for excitement.

Hold on to this person.

If you are still in a relationship where the only thing you have in common is your love of raves, favorite brand of tequila and method for a hangover cure, you might want to rethink where the relationship is going.

15. Do one thing every month that scares you.

The best part of aging is growing mentally.

Nothing exceptional happens inside our comfort zone.

Although leaving our cozy comfort zone is scary, challenge yourself to do it at least once a month.

It could be something small like going to a karaoke bar or something really big like skydiving.

Whatever it is, take advice from Nike and just do it.

16. Reflect on the past but focus on the future.

We are our own worst critics. Sometimes we get caught up in all of the what ifs of life.

Stop focusing on past mistakes and focus on the brand new year ahead of you.

This is a year full of promise and opportunity. This is going to be your year.

It’s clichéd, but this is a chance for a new year and a new you or as I like to put it, a new year and a better you.

7 Tips For Hosting A Perfect And Stress-Free Friendsgiving

http://elitedaily.com/life/tips-best-friendsgiving/1292419/

Thanksgiving is my favorite day of the year.

There’s reruns of “Charlie Brown,” an abundance of pumpkin pastries in every grocery store and the scent of apple-cinnamon candles that fills every store you meander through.

It just puts me in a thankful mood.

Furthermore, any holiday that encourages gratitude and gives an excuse for overeating is fine by me. Bring on the stretchy pants.

Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks with our families, but what about our friends?

He Is Temporary: The Definitive Rules For Dating A ‘Mr. Right Now’

Original article was posted on Elite Daily.

http://elitedaily.com/dating/date-mr-right/1259255/

I was new to Orange County.

After having been single for seven years (by choice), I decided I was going to try online dating and finally find the Mr. Big to my Carrie Bradshaw.

I joined OkCupid, and little did I know I was about to kiss a lot of frogs.

There were frugal frogs, stage-five clinger frogs, flakey frogs, cheater frogs with girlfriends and the nice-but-no-chemistry frogs.

I was on and off the site for two years.

During my residency at OkCupid, I was averaging two to three dates per week.

Now I know how this looks, but trust me when I say they were mostly first — or at most, second — dates.

I only had a handful of OkCupid relationships that lasted more than a week, and they all ended in disaster.

I started out my dating game obviously looking for the typical tall, dark and handsome, but I was most concerned with finding a spontaneous, hopeless romantic who could make me laugh.

I ended my quest by looking for the opposite of what I had wanted when I first joined the site.

In the end, I just wanted a nice guy.

Homes Are People Not Places—My African American Dream

The older I get, the more I think about what I will tell my future son or daughter one day about growing up in South Africa and immigrating to the US when I was 12. The sad reality is that I will never get to take my child to Milky Lane Ice-cream like my dad took me every Sunday or meander the malls of Sandton with my daughter like my mom did with my aunt and me every Saturday. When you immigrate as a child, you leave your child self and childhood in your home country.

Relationship Threesomes…

If you are in a relationship; you should be in a threesome. This  seems totally weird… And no this has nothing to do with sex… But hear me out… I believe that relationships are between three people- your significant other, you, and yourself. Your s/o-The person you are dating, you- the s/o’s person they are dating, yourself- your longest and endless relationship also your most important relationship. Why is this? Because when two people have been dating for at least 6 months, they tend to get comfortable, you tend to stop working on yourself and you leave yourself out of the relationship and just focus on your s/o. The sweats come out and the cute yoga pants get put away. While it’s critical that you feel you can be yourself around your s/o, you should always try to be your best self. By “best self”I don’t mean, don’t have bad days and cake yourself in makeup, La Perla and cocktail dresses (while this is nice, we are not living in the Upper East side circa Gossip Girl). By best self, I mean don’t use this person as an emotional punching bag, don’t lounge in sweats all weekend and don’t stop trying to be better.  Always remember you are dating yourself first and wouldn’t you want to date the best person possible?